Hello knife...meet my heart.

Mother's Day is tomorrow. I thankfully have to work. Why do I say this? Because this is the day I was supposed to be celebrating my first ever mother's day as a, well, real mom. I would have been 8 months exactly tomorrow. I would have been ready to pop. I would have gotten so many cute things for my little one, and would be just about to use them all. I would almost be a mommy.

I thought about this all day today. I broke down in the bathroom. I broke down to my husband. I broke down in a vacant guest room for crying out loud! I just do not know how I will get through tomorrow. Its days like this I go back to where I was....and when I was getting so far from that place. It brings me back to that day all over again when the mom title was taken from me. These are the days I dread.

Tomorrow, I will be happy. I will put on a happy face for my co-workers who are moms, a happy face for my sisters, and a big smiling face for my Grandma and Mom. But believe me...inside I will be dying.